Tuesday, January 29, 2013

And the double whammy today...

I just got notified that the South Maui Triathlon that I was doing in June has been cancelled...

sigh.

It was bound to happen...

...and now I need to not kick myself over it.

I just ran out of gas today. I ended up not doing my run today because I just ran out of time and gas. I've noticed that this may be a potential problem as I continue forward. Waiting until the evenings to do my workouts leaves me vulnerable to a day like today in which work goes into extra innings and I end up leaving the office way too late, worn out, and just ready to be home.

I tried to get downstairs or get to the gym, but neither was happening.

I think what I'm going to have to do is start doing the workouts before work, but I'm not an A.M. person. So, therein lies a challenge.

Not a great week on the workout front so far. Only got in half or less of my swim because of the power outage, didn't get in the run today. I'm going to try and make some of it up tomorrow and make a plan to get up and do my real swim workout in the morning before work. Then I can double up and do the run I was going to do today, tomorrow night along with the elliptical workout.

Ugh, sounds like a killer day, but I've got to get back on track.

Didn't help that I didn't do the best on the food front either today. <sigh>

Monday, January 28, 2013

And now for my lovely candlelight swim...

I figured that on this journey I would get some interesting stories to tell and tonight is probably my first of what will likely be many.

So, I hit the gym tonight to put in a little time on the elliptical, lift some weights, and then do my primary workout of a 2200 yard swim (not all at once, yet!). So I'm trundling along, lane-splitting with another triathlete who is training for Ironman Montreal. Very friendly woman. Bang! The entire facility goes black. And I mean pitch black. Parking lot lights through the window, gone. Interior lights, gone. Emergency lights, uh, why do we have no emergency lights. After what seems like an enternity and after my lane-splitting buddy and I whack into each other, the emergency lights come on. All two of them. It was enough to see your way around if you were trying to get out, but not exactly bright illumination.

What to do, you ask? Keep swimming, of course. Real triathletes don't know what quit means, or so I'm told. So I figure if I'm going to be a real athlete, I keep going. Ok, now I have to admit - swimming in the dark is a lot more challenging than you would think. The lane lines on the bottom of the pool are practically invisible in the dark - and those emergency lights don't exactly penetrate the pool. I did get about another ten laps or so in before the staff came and chased us out because the power wasn't coming back on anytime soon it appeared.

I tried!

On a happy note today, Monday is always my weigh-in day... Dropped another 2.2 pounds this past week. I'm now approaching a major milestone in which the most significant digit of my weight is about to drop. I'm also probably about, given my current average weight loss, a month from having dropped 100 pounds. That number is huge! It's sometimes a little depressing to realize where I was, but at the same point, I have to be proud of how far I have come. I still have a ways to go to get to my goal.

Another happy note happened over the weekend when my wife dug out a bag of clothes that had been lingering in the garage because I had outgrown them. I ended up donating a bunch of them because they were too small! Now that was a great feeling. It was also a great feeling to see shirts and other clothes that I used to remember wearing and now they either fit or were too big!

Back to training talk ... I'll probably do my swim again this week to make up for the fact that I probably only got about 1/3 of it in tonight.

Saturday, January 26, 2013

Tough day...

This weekend is going to be a tough weekend.

I was scheduled to do a four to five mile run today, but I just couldn't get that far today. My right inner thigh muscles started feeling pain, and not in a good way, and as well I started developing a blister on my right foot. I'm not sure where the blister is coming from and that makes me nervous. However, I did wear a different pair of shoes down to Irvine and I'm wondering if my feet changed positions or gait and that caused it? I did at least get in three miles though, so in the grand scheme of things I made forward progress. That was on top of doing 45 minutes of interval elliptical and lifting weights on my legs for around 30-45 minutes or so.

Tomorrow is a indoor cycling class with my coach on the Computrainer. I suspect there will be zero energy left in my legs when she's through with me.

So what do I take away from a day in which I didn't live up to my goals?

I think I should be proud of the fact that I did still do a lot today even if I didn't hit my target.
I think I should be cognizant of the fact that I recognized I was going to hurt myself and be down for longer if I didn't stop. I do just have to work on the little bird in the back of my head that tells me that I shouldn't have stopped and I'm a wuss for doing so.

Today probably wasn't a step back, but it might not have been the full step forward. I need to be OK with days like today.

Anyone out there have suggestions on how they deal with things like this?

On the bright side, I'm getting to break in my new bike for the first time... and hopefully not embarrass myself. :)

Friday, January 25, 2013

Left foot, right foot; wash, rinse, repeat

There are days in which it's just hard to think about training.

For those of you just joining, no I'm not giving up, I'm just noting that after a nearly 22 hour long day yesterday making a day trip to Irvine, CA and only getting about four hours of sleep today, I'm feeling a bit tired.

But here is what is different from me six months ago to me today:

I worked out anyway; And I worked out hard!

My calendar called for a set of strength training and PT exercises followed by a 2-mile interval workout. So, at 10:00 pm or so I went downstairs to the garage, fired up the treadmill and blasted out my two miles. Since I was smart enough to calibrate the foot pod last time I ran outside, I trust that the distance was correct and the speeds good. Even with a little wiggle room for error, I ran more, and faster than I have yet. My heart rate was up there at times - but it also comes down way faster than it used to.

Here is what is different with me. I believe in myself. I've never had a lot of self-confidence. Any of my work friends that are reading this are probably scratching their heads because I generally don't project such an image. But it's true, I'm hard on myself to the point of making myself believe that I can't do anything right. As my wife would say, "stop kicking yourself. You've already got one bad ankle".

Maybe I have stopped.

It would be easy to have just blown off the workout tonight and just crawled into a nice, warm, comfy bed and called it a day, but I didn't. I fired up a movie and focused on just putting one foot in front of the other and keep it going until my intervals were done. My ankle hurts when I run still and I'm certainly not pain free elsewhere - but it does not matter. I just focus on putting one foot in front of the other.

I saw an interesting Chinese proverb - even the longest journey must begin where you stand. I am now at least one step further than the beginning.

(Nota Bene to the reader: The title of this blog is borrowed and modified from a story that I read about another triathlete's blog from a book titled "You are an Ironman". I highly recommend the read - the stories in there about everyday age group triathletes preparing and racing Ironman Arizona nearly brought me to tears on the plane home)

Dead Last > DNF >> DNS

Let me introduce myself to you, my reader, and also welcome you to my blog.

Who am I? Well, there are so many answers to that question, but let's try a few. I am a big guy. I lovingly refer to myself as a running (almost running) buffalo. I know I'm not a gazelle and I never will be. But I have desire. I have hope. I have determination. I started this journey about 6 months ago in July of 2012 because I had become more than a buffalo. I had reached 6' 3" and tipped the scale at 385.6 lbs when I began this journey. How did I get that big? Lots of choices, some events that I should have controlled better, and just ... well, just because I didn't respect myself.

In June of 2011, I lay in a hospital bed with my wife sitting by the side of the bed with fear in her eyes because she thought I might die. My wife is the strongest, bravest, most level headed person in a crisis I have ever met, yet I saw the fear that I have never seen in her before. In the process of recovering from my 5th orthopedic surgery in 5 years, I suffered two pulmonary embolisms and spent two different stints in the hospital while recovering from that. Laying there, I knew something had to change, but life wasn't quite ready to give me a break yet as I ended up having two more orthopedic surgeries before this journey began - including a 2nd major surgery on my ankle.

Something had to change and when I looked in the mirror, I knew that thing was me. I never wanted to see the fear in my wife's eyes again. I wanted to look in the mirror at myself and see something I was proud of. My family all around me has suffered medical calamity and I knew that I was at the moment when I had to decide how my life is going to unfold. I want to control my own destiny and become an athlete again.

So I made a decision. I decided to become a triathlete. Now in fairness, I've done one triathlon before,  10+ years ago.

Why a triathlon? Great question. When I watch the TV coverage of the Ironman World Championships in Kona, I stand in awe of what each and every one of those athletes has accomplished. And it's not just the professionals whose athletic prowess is amazing. It's the age groupers - the people who finish in 12, 13, 14, 15, 16 hours. The people who have the courage to keep one foot moving in front of the other for that length of time. The person who crosses the finish line at a minute to midnight to the roar of the crowd inspires me. The person who has one leg, no legs, missing limbs who crosses the finish line inspires me.

Which leads us to the title of this entry: Dead Last > DNF >> DNS. I didn't invent this motto, I saw it on the internet (I cannot remember where), but I am taking this to heart. Because I believe the person who has the courage to go out there and put it all on the line, to take the brave first step, to take that first stroke at the sound of the cannon, to continue moving forward and finish is to be admired. It does not matter if they finish dead last, because they finished, and that is far greater than having never had the courage to start in the first place.

I have the courage to start.
I have the will to finish.
I have the strength to carry on.

I have begun. I am already 82 pounds lighter in the last 6 months. I am not done.

What do I want from this blog? I want someone out there who is facing a health challenge, facing a weight problem, facing a lack of self-esteem to read this and find hope. I want at the end of my journey to inspire someone else to take that first step out of the door and try a challenge. Believe in yourself, believe that you can do this. I want to pay forward the inspiration I have found from the uncommon, yet ordinary, people that have overcome challenges and obstacles to call themselves "Ironman". If you are reading this and find yourself wondering what could be, welcome to the club. I think we're getting t-shirts made.

I know I cannot make this journey alone. I am incredibly lucky to have a massively supportive wife. I know this journey will be hard as I will be training many times when I would rather just be with her. One the greatest things I am blessed with is the fact that she wants me to do this. I no longer see the fear I saw when I was lying in the hospital bed, I see pride, strength, and support. So to you, my dear wife - I tip my hat every day.

I am lucky to have found a great coach and trainer to help me and I am lucky to have friends and family around me that encourage me and keep me moving.

This journey does not have an end, but it does have a milestone ... Ironman Miami 70.3 on October 27, 2013. That is my target.

Welcome to my blog and to my journey and thank you for reading this on my long, and what will probably be an interesting, road to Miami.
So the next time you see a big guy huffing and puffing along side the road ... it could be me.
We bison may not be fast, but we are strong.